are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
