I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
This toilet bowl is my home.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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