1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
