Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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