I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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