I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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