She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
