i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
