Will you blow on my dice?
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
