I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
