bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
