I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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