I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You can't special order awesome
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
