We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize