so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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