in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Actions speak louder than pants.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
