You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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