people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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