It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize