I feel like I'm in dance class right now
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
