every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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