I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
