I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm too high and old for this...
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
