My sheets look like a crime scene.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
