He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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