New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
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