I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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