Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
