Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
