everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
