i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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