You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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