Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
