dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
