The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
