Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
