I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
