marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
