we're blogging at a bar
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
