he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
