He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
