he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
