we're chasing vodka with high fives
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I have already put on my inside pants.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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