You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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