I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
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