Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Randomize
