the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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