I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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