Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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