party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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