This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize